Attempted Rape in Buffy: Why I'm Still Pissed About Xander
A Comparison of the Events of "The Pack" and "Seeing Red" and How This Demonstrates a Typical Lack of Narrative Consequences for Xander and His Bad Behavior

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Thank you to sainfoin_fields for letting me traumatize her by trying to work this out at her in gchat. Without you guy, I might never find my brain power again.

In the last day, I've found links to cetera's post about rape on my flist from both caitiedidit (Her post about why women go to the bathroom together and why it isn't funny, which really made me realize things I'd never thought about but automatically know are true) and spectralbovine (his post, the post of a man taking responsibility for himself and his gender facing the issue. He also links to rachelmanija's post about misconceptions about rape that most men believe at least one of [a post that immediately proves the truth of men's defensive bullshit in the comments]).

Last night, lying in bed with my current batch of insomnia, I realized that I really wanted to go for a run (well the idea of a run, in practice running and me don't mix) but that I would be an idiot to go after midnight by myself, even in my safe little town... perhaps especially in my safe little town. Men, my readers are mostly women and men don't want to hear this... but I'll say it anyway. Because, maybe, appealing to their desire to be manly is the only way to get through:

What men need to believe and understand is that raping someone, pressuring or manipulating them into having sex with you, taking advantage of them in a vulnerable state... well that makes you LESS OF A MAN. Seriously, if you feel the need to use any of those methods to get some, well obviously you aren't man enough to get a woman in any legitimate way. And you are probably too scared to try. Because she might say no, and if you accept that she gets to then you might face rejection. Well stop being such a whiny little bitch, man up, and deal. Your manhood will thank you.

Also, in those borderline cases (you're both really drunk, she just broke up with her boyfriend, etc.) I promise you... waiting will pay off. She will like you better for it, and believe me if she actually wants to have sex with you tonight... she's probably going to want to next week too. And if it doesn't work out, well she's going to remember you as the good guy, and she's a hell of a lot more likely to introduce you to her cute friend in the future, instead of telling her to steer clear of you because you can't be trusted.

You should do better because it's the right thing to do... but, if you don't have an internal understanding of that, go ahead and do it for selfish reasons.

After 4 times of seeing Star Trek in the theater... Well 4 times for me, twice for her (DON'T JUDGE!) sainfoin_fields and I present:


A Particularly Troubled Meme

Step 1: Ask your flist for suggestions of characters or people or books or whatever.

Step 2: Describe your flist's requested topics in the format of Original Spock's summary of Nero:


_____, a particularly troubled _______ ...


Examples:

Gaston, a particularly troubled Frenchman...

Bill, a particularly troubled polygamist...


The Bluths, a particularly incestuous family, are forced to deal with reality when George Sr., a particularly troubled ice cream sandwich lover, is arrested.

Sarah, a particularly troubled escaped convict, attempts to save the world and her son, John (a particularly troubled messiah) from Skynet, a particularly troubled computer system, with the help of Cameron, a particularly troubled robot. ]

Now taking requests and inviting you to share in the fun.

1) I got my hair cut finally. It's an a-line bob that's stacked in the back (chin length in the front, most of the way up my neck in the back). The woman kept stabbing me in the neck with her fingers, but I am liking the cut so it's okay. Probably will still look for someone new next time though. I also got a new straightener. I went with Chi and it is sparkly and teal green. Hopefully I will get around to posting pictures soon.

2) Sunday night, I saw the Star Trek movie for the 3rd time. We went to the drive in, which was awesome. You can bring in all the food you want, it's cheaper to get in, you can talk as much as you want, no one is kicking the back of your seat, and you don't have to listen to other people. Also now that they do they sound through your car radio it is so much better. We are thinking Terminator: Salvation and Harry Potter: HBP will be seen this way.

3) Yesterday I went to go visit my grandparents finally after meaning to for months. It was super nice and I got to see my two most entertaining uncles as well, as my uncle Greg is out visiting from Florida and my uncle Tim came over to record my grandmother talking about stuff she remembers as part of a sort of oral family history thing. I admit... it was pretty awesome to have both of them to myself since usually I have to compete with the other 14 cousins and 6-11 uncles and aunts, plus significant others, and you cousins' children.

Everyone is now writing Nancy Drew fanfiction. Apparently my Greg and his wife wrote their own ND novels for NaNoWriMolast year and now my uncle Tim wants to do one too. So I said I'd join in. Sometimes I fucking love my family.

4) Now I am at allchildren's, eating Cheez-its, petting the Captain, and such.

5) I am sure you have already all seen this, but if not: Amazing Kirk vid

6) Femslash!

7) Fuck you FOX. Fuck you so much.

Okay flist, I need some help:

I am in the market for a new flat iron. Mine I have had since late 2001 and they have obviously gotten a lot better since then... mine is not even ceramic. I have a lot of hair, which I would describe as medium to coarse; it's more wavy than curly really. So I need something fairly powerful and not too light on the heat, as well as not too small. I'm planning on cutting my hair off into an a-line bob again (A freedom that only that first discovery of the flat iron made possible. My wave/curls are too big for short hair to look good for the most part without being straightened or artificially curled.) so I badly need your advice since the internet at large is proving to be no help. So, what do you guys use/like? I'd prefer not to spent over $100 since I am currently not working.

Also, I wrote T:SCC fic a couple weeks back: Maybe, That First Time, John, Kyle/Allison, Derek. In case you missed it or whatever. I'm still taking ficlet requests as well, if anyone is interested.

Via beck_liz: Neil Gaiman says to entitled hoes: George R. R. Martin is not your bitch. Awww Neil Gaiman! You are awesome. Maybe I will just utilize my insomnia to stay up all night reading more Sandman (yes, I finally started).

In other news, my siblings are currently both on my shitlist to varying degrees. My sister needs to grow the fuck up and realize there are certain standards of adult behavior she needs to adhere to if she wants to be treated as anything other than a bratty self-absorbed child. On the other hand, my father called me without any prompting the other day. You win some; you lose some.

Sibling-geddon threatened to ruin my belated birthday festivities but crisis was eventually averted and fun and alcohol were had by all.

I have seen the new Star Trek movie twice. It really could have been subtitled: Spock PWNS so much that times two was necessary.

In TV news: I love Castle to pieces, Bones is still kind of weird this season, Dollhouse's finale was a little sloppy, and OMG Grey's Anatomy... way to realize like 3 years late where you went wrong.

We watched Caprica. There was man-pain. And gratuitous cyber sex-drugs-violence. And racism. Plus terrorism and religious persecution.

Meme: Give me a letter and I will tell you 5 things I like that start with that letter.

Ugh. It's 2:30 and my heart is pounding so fast I'm almost shaking, that and my now familiar friend the nausea. What the fuck is wrong with me? Is this the reward I get for being proactive today and actually putting myself out there, instead of skulking and avoiding? I am meant to feel better after sending out resumes and such. It is times like these that I feel like learning to meditate would be a good investment.

On the other hand, tonight on Castle: Carla from Scrubs and motherfucking ♥Weevil♥. I love Castle's relationship with his daughter so much. Also that young girl is seriously so pretty and I constantly adore how they represent her so nicely without sexing her up weirdly like most teenage girls on tv. And I love how he's kind of secretly a super good guy under all the smarmy sleaze.

Anyway, I'm thinking about doing some VM rewatch, just seeing Fracis Capra on the screen made me miss the good parts of that show so hard. There's a very short list of characters that I've felt so incredibly strongly about (Martha Jones of Doctor Who being the only one since that I can think of... which reminds my that I really need to get my hands on Law and Order: Fucking Pretty).

But first, to get to sleep and stop feeling like a crazy manic person. 25 is meant to be a better year for me than 24, and crazed insomnia is not part of that plan.

Title: Maybe, That First Time
Fandom: Terminator: The Sarah Connor Chronicles
Characters/Pairings: John Connor, Kyle/Allison, Derek
Rating: General
Word Count: 1196
Notes: Written for allchildren/sainfoin_fields who wanted: Kyle/Allison, escape. Hope the John POV works for you, the idea just sort of ran away on me.

(  The day he reprograms his first terminator, he realizes that he is running out of time. )

I am currently working on cleaning up my disgustingly filthy apartment (Seriously, how did it get this bad? I blame the gnomes. Although why cat would want her home to be gross is beyond me.), having finally seemingly recovered from last week's nasty virus and yesterday's possible migraine. Of course since it is raining I cannot vacuum because the cat will not go outside and gets really upset if I do so while she is here. Sigh. Well there is enough dishes, counter cleaning, etc. that it's not like I don't have my work cut out for me.

I have Dreamwidth codes; if any of you guys want one let me know.

I also have a desire to write some ficlets, please give me prompts.

OMG, how is it 5AM already?


Things done on 4/28 so far:

1)Obsessed about time passage in A Song of Ice and Fire and mostly falsely accused GRRM of lacking Math skills.

2) Nearly made level 61 on my Warlock before the server shut down, except a Death Knight set me back about 6 minutes.

3)Helped my brother edit his paper on Kayne West and the evils of Auto-Tune.



At this point might as well try and stay up and re-set the sleep cycle to something more civilized.

On reviewing the appendices for different A Song of Ice and Fire volumes to try and determine exactly how much time has actually passed since you can't use seasons to judge time passage:

"Uh oh, apparently GRRM can't do math any more than JKR."

( Kids Ages By Book For the Starks , Lannisters, and Arryns )

Overall:

Robb ages from 14 to 16 (2 years)
Sansa ages from 11 to 12 by the third book and then goes unspecified (1+ years)
Arya goes from 9 to 11 (2 years)
Bran goes from 7 to 9 (2 years)
Rickon goes from 3 to 4 years (1 year)

Joffery goes from 12 to 13 and then back to 12 again (effectively no years)
Mrycella goes from 8 to 9 (1 year)
Tommen goes from 7 to 8 (1 year)

Robert Arryn goes from 6 to 8 between the first and second books and stays there (2 years)

Since Robert Arryn ages two years in that first jump and everyone else 1, we have to assume that the first book covers a little over a year. But then all the Stark children including Robb age years over all except for little Rickon, but the Lannister children only one, except for Joffery who gain no years overall. Birthdays could account for all of this except for Joffery's mysterious redacted year, except that it seems odd that one book took over a year and other three combined less than one... and then we get to the issue of ( spoilers )


I guess technically it is all possible (with the exception of the Joffery thing) and only goes to show us that each progressive book gives us more detail and less movement. Still, given how long travel takes seemingly and a certain impression of time spent, such as ( spoilers ) it seems odd that so little time would have passed.

I just went for a little walk on the path behind my apartment and I saw:

* a bunch of beautiful wildflowers

* a precious hopping bunny

* a ridiculously adorable and soft looking baby skunk

1) So I have been pathetic and ill for the last few days. Cold symptoms of cough, congestion, fever etc. combining with allergies is made of fail. The pressure is so fucked up my my head that I couldn't even hear the music the guys re-carpeting the apartment next to ours were playing (which was a blessing in disguise). Trader Joes boxed soup is a godsend in times like these. Jeremy and Cupcake are also sick, but he is trying to be stoic and she is just being a terrible bitch.

2) We are now watching season 2 of Dexter, and I think that all of my qualms about female representation were outweighed by the power and awesome of LaGuerta telling her boss to go fuck himself because "erratic is just another word for not male". Seriously one of the most poignant things I've seen on any show regarding this issue. Other things are making me want to die (not in the show is bad way, in the painful and affecting way) but I'm glad we finally got aorund to watching this show.

3) I continue to adore Castle, and was noticing during the last episode that the women of the show are not your typical "attractive females". This has been a standing observation about Detective Beckett, who I find to have a not very appealing face (sorry but it's true). I don't mean this as a criticism... I like the actress in the role quite well. But I was actually more struck this week by all the women at the charity event and all their round healthy looking faces, not a model or starlet type in there. I thought they were distinctively pleasant to look at, but it wasn't the usual casting.

4) Yes, I have a Dreamwidth account (from the random drawing thing). Same as ye old LJ name as I am pretty happy with my pseudonym and always have been. Until further notice I will just be crossposting everything. Feel free to add me if you have an account.

Quote of the Night:

(While talking about the new raid being totally broken and people not being able to move at all in it, let alone play)

"Dominance¹ is playing trivia bot."

¹ The top guild on our server at the moment.

Title: Sapphires and Emeralds
Fandom: A Song of Ice and Fire
Rating: General
Character(s): Brienne
Word Count: 499
Summary: Back on Tarth...
Notes: Written for zoeiona during a ficlet exchange.

( The servants were getting used to her giving orders, but Brienne knew they would like it better if she'd brought home a lord husband to give them for her.  )

I have no idea why my WoW Downdloader takes exponentially longer to download that Jeremy's since we are on the same internet/router. The app always says I appear to be behind a firewall. I keep coming back to the mac firewall issue, but I have it on the "allow all" setting so I don't know what else I can do since for whatever reason the preferences and debilitatingly simple and obvious. Googling just finds others bitching and advice to do... well what I already have. At this rate I won't be able to play until tomorrow!

I stayed up until 3AM writing Jaime/Brienne smut against my better judgment. It is not quite done and I am totally unsure if it is postable. In Harry Potter fandom I would have posted it no problem and people would have been into it. Actually in a lot of fandoms it would be a hit. But I feel like we have higher standards in ASOIAF fandom. I really just don't know if it is good or terrible or whatever. I feel like I've lost my writing compass.

Also the landscapers are outside and their leaf blowers and making bits of something hit my windows angrily.


Generally i am just feeling full of foreboding and possibly it is my hormone cycle happening ( I will know in two days if so). That or the cat cursed me with doom. Either seems equally likely.

Flist, link things of glee to me.

Some wonderful person bought me paid account time. Whoever you are, anonymous angel, thank you!

Therefore, a poll.

I've been thinking recently about how old we are meant to read Brienne as. I mean in the book's world women are thought of as coming of age fairly young, and Brienne is a puzzling mixture of innocence and experience that doesn't automatically pinpoint her.

Poll #1383115 Brienne's Age Poll
Open to: All, detailed results viewable to: All

How old do you think of Brienne as being?

You know what is aggravating? Having your paid account run out mere weeks before Dreamwidth opens up and having to lose all your icons or pay for a service you are not sure you will be using. It took like an hour but I finally managed to get down to six icons that cover the basic emotion groups (sad, happy, sexy, wtf, and angry/annoyed).

Check Out My Artisty

So I read Turn Coat last night, which was awesome as I've come to expect from the Dresden books. Somehow, Butcher always manages to bring it in a major league way. Seriously people, you should start reading them, they are delicious fictional crack and will make you happy. Sadly at least part of all three of my 3 fic ideas are totally jossed by the events of the book. But the events were worth being jossed by, even if sad.

This year, I finally attempted a seder of my own (after planning to for like 3 years and flaking or giving in to family pressure). It could have gone better; it could have gone worse. It was just Jeremy and I and sophia_helix and actoplasm, which was good in the sense of my only having a very small table, but weird in that I was the only one who'd ever been to a seder before. I felt sort of awkward, at least until the wine kicked in.

On BPAL news, I definitely need to swap my Bhagdad for one that is more spicy. Lady Macbeth, Frumious Bandersnatch, and March Hare are all lovely on me. Juke Joint smells great in the bottle but turned sort of baby powdery on me, losing it's refreshing edge. I'm trying Siren right now; so far it has sweetened up somewhat on my skin but still seems distressingly woody (Must be the white ginger since I doubt it's the jasmine, vanilla, or apricot), probably just as well given my issues with ginger.

With the TV season wrapping up quickly (Oh Life! Why did you have to pick the pace back up and end awesomely and therefore make me sad that you will not get renewed even though it is your own fault you wasted this season for the most part? Oh Sarah Connor Chronicles! How are you so awesome?) it is sort of accidentally nice that Fox has kept fucking with Bones' schedule and doing weird empty weeks, because now there is still a lot of it left. More even than Dollhouse with it's late start. Does anyone know how many episodes Castle has this season?


Ugh! I never should have tried BPAL with ginger in it! It is making me want to die as well as not smelling good. Time to go scrub myself clean and then I will reward myself by trying Bengal on at last, which in the bottle smells perfect. Then in a few hours Jeremy will come home and we will go enjoy the fact that Little Caesars has opened up right down the street (my favorite big pizza franchise and one that is generally disappearing) and Jeremy got paid today and we have paid all our bills. But first, to get rid of this terrible judgment error of scent.